upatsix.com - Your Source For Pet Bird Information

I have never felt as stupid and clueless as I have been these last few months. It has been trial and error for me. I adopted Sylvester a Blue Crested Conure, 4 months ago. He was very lovable but became withdrawn by the day. I HAVE to work during the day or else we won't have anything to eat and blamed this chill of his on resentment. This led to me getting him a friend, Tweety. They are now really happy with each other but want pretty much nothing to do with Mommy. Unless of course it involves their breakfast and dinner (yes, they get spoon-fed).

They have stacks of toys and this is changed on a two monthly basis to avoid boredom. They have a really big cage inside the house. I leave the TV on for them as background noise and entertainment. They screech to get their way and whenever I do something they do not like. I ignore this most of the time (sometimes this is tough) but have occasionally raised my voice to let them know I don't really like it.

They act like I mistreat them when in fact I have only been lovable and have really tried hard to bond with them. This really breaks my heart each time I try to get close to them as I really am so crazy about them.

Please help by telling me what I can do to make this right and to be a good Conure "Mommy"

A few questions first to give me and others more to work with as we try to help you, Eileen.

Are these your first birds?

Did you adopt through an organization or directly from an individual?

What attracted you to conures?

What is your knowledge level re parrots in general and methods for solving behavior issues? Do you read (books, magazines, chats, online articles) about birds, attend seminars, etc?

Your answers will tell us where to start! Also a little about each bird would help and the size of their cage, where located, diet, time out of cage, and a list of the other animals/humans in your home.

Paca

And their age and history info would be good.

All of that information would be great and very helpful.


Still, there is one thing that I think I should mention right off the bat.
You did say that you have raised your voice a couple of times to show that you are upset. Birds do not understand negative reinforcement and raising your voice does not show your displeasure since they view such things differently than humans do. In the wild birds scream for various reasons. Human yelling appears "normal" to them, and they may even get louder to join in a flock activity.

Knowledge on birds:
I had a parrot growing up. He was very confident and not weary of me at all. That is as much experience as I have.

I have some friends that have given me advise. I bought them from a very reputable breeder. They supplied me with information on feeding and taking care of them. I have not been able to get my hands on a conure book in the bookstores here in South Africa.

Where they stay
The have a cage that is about 1.5m high and 1.5m wide. They have tons of toys in it.

What they eat:
Their diet consists of. A meal provided by a very good pet food supplier. Amazone or something like that. This is mixed with a baby porridge containing no preservatives and dairy. They get good multi coloured and shaped pellet to knibble on throughout the day. The also get fruit and veggies occasionally.

Why I bought them:
I love birds and just felt a bit of a connection when I met Sylvester (maybe this was just from my side), but I may have made an assumption that conures are more like the parrot I had previously. I still really love them, just do not know how to work with them. I really want to make them happy birds.

Age:
The breeder said that they are still young. About a year and a half old.

Hope this helps guys!

Eileen

eileen wrote::cry: ... They are now really happy with each other but want pretty much nothing to do with Mommy. Unless of course it involves their breakfast and dinner (yes, they get spoon-fed)... They screech to get their way and whenever I do something they do not like... They act like I mistreat them when in fact I have only been lovable and have really tried hard to bond with them. This really breaks my heart each time I try to get close to them as I really am so crazy about them...

First, I have many birds, but never a conure, so my advice doesn't come from a species-specific perspective. Since you've had Sylvester only 4 months and Tweety less time, in your concern for his happiness, you gave him (now them) no chance to get to know you. I'm only presuming you didn't quarantine Tweety. The isolation of quarantine for 30-60 days allows excellent bonding time.

Now, unfortunately for you, they have bonded with each other and, as you say, are quite happy. I feel that it's cruel to separate bonded pairs, so my advice is that you let them have each other and you bow out gracefully. Let them enjoy your good care and love for them from a distance. That, to me, is the kindest thing you can do. Maybe in time, the breeder or another you respect, will want to take them and let them stay happily together for life.

In time, you might want to start over with another baby. Maybe not such a noisy conure this time. We can give you lots of support and advice for how to establish a loving bond with a hand-fed baby or a tame rehomed bird. What kind of parrot did you have growing up? That might be the kind you'd be happiest with next time.

Sorry, Paca

Try taking one at a time into a different room and spending time there. You can try trick training, clicker training, singing songs, playing peek-a-boo, etc. Do it consistantly and take your time. Hopefully you'll be able to establish separate relationships. Above all, patience. Good luck!

Thank you all of you for all the advise and information. This does shed a lot more light on what has been happening and makes me feel a bit less like a failure. It has also tought me that I need to take more time when deciding on birds as pets. I did not know that the species are so different and may not have made a practical choice. Still I owe it to my babies to try to learn to understand them.

I must absolutely agree that I would not like to interfere in any way if they are happy. I also do not want to unsettle them in any way. If then I am not doing anything obviously wrong maybe I should just see where this goes as I really have really become fond of them and cannot see myself parting with the two unless it becomes really necessary. This would not be bad for them if I look after them like I have as in my previous reply, would it?

My previous Parrot was a Knysna Parrot. They are not really the bonding type but this one became really affectionate after a lot of time spent together.

I need to go and give the two their morning porridge.. can hear them calling for it!

Another option would be to gradually get them into seperate cages so that they can still see each other and talk to each other, but you can bond with them better. It might not be a great option, but it's an idea.
You could get one used to another cage to the point where he's sleeping in it with the cages side side, touching each other. Then, each week you can move them a little bit until they're a few feet apart.
Maybe someone else can add to this.


Another thing you can do is purchase Sally Blanchard's Companion Parrot Handbook. It's a great book for new parrot owners and will help give you more insight. It can be purchased online and shipped to you.

I have been hesitating to answer this thread mainly because you did differently from what I would have done. Not that your motives weren't good or my way is better but we are on different tracks.

Of all the advice you have been given I think sugar cookies is best. What are your motives. Do you want 2 birds devoted exclusively to each other or do you want pets bonded to you? If it is the latter you will have to separate them but this may lead to constant screaming and calling. In order to bond to you the birds need quality one on one interaction with you. Since you got the other bird to fill in for your absence you will have to step back and consider your options to separate or not. It will take work on your part.Do not consider another bird until you decide about the 2 you already have and see how they work out.

Just a suggestion about diet---birds have difficulty digesting dairy. It should be offered sparingly. Do offer fruits and veggies daily if possible.

Keep us posted------Yogi

i have many bonded pairs ,, or birds as we would call it two in each avery. they can bond with you as well and yet be bonded to each other. you do need to work with them together and separate. to start youre bonding , i even have a pair of suns who has laid and still when i walk in jump in my shirt and play and play with me , its all about giving them the attention handling and love. it can be done it might take a while . im lucky because all my pairs my duskys 4 suns a nanday . greeen cheeks and fallow green cheeks are pets , then bonded with each other , yet i hnadle each and every one , again its just are you willing to work with them each and together ... just because a bonds with another bird does not mean they arent pets , and wont bond to you... they are young enough to learn to bond to you and each other good luck