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My budgie Stormy has started behaving strangely. I purchased Stormy and Achmed (her departed mate) from a local pet store. Neither of them were hand tame when I purchased them. Stormy was younger than Achmed so she was easier to tame. Everything was going well except Achmed started attacking me when I put my hand in the cage or when Stormy got too close to him. I separated them so he could no longer attack Stormy. I had to use gloves to change Achmed's food and water. About a month ago Achmed passed away from a tumor. Now this last week stormy has started acting strangely.

She is suddenly afraid of my hand, she is screeching and flapping her wings. She used to let me hold her and take her out of her cage. She is eating and drinking normally and everything else is normal except her behavior. I took her to the vet to make sure she was okay and the vet said she was fine and that there was nothing to worry about. I have a feeling that its because her mate is no longer with us. I just want to get other bird owners opinions because I would hate to lose another one. It was heart wrenching enough losing Achmed even though he was kind of mean towards the end. I know this is kind of a lot to read but I thought some background might help to solve this problem.

The last question I have, is it possible to do anything to help turn this behavior around or is this something that she has to fix on her own?

Any advice anyone can give will be greatly appreciated.

It's hard to say if the behavior happened due to Achmed passing, or if something recent has occured.

It may be best to treat her as if you've just gotten her and work on regaining her trust again.

Stormy is a little better. We removed the cage after achmed passed. The only thing right now that is still bothering me is that she is still very skittish. When she is inside her cage she will sit on my hand for short periods of time but anytime she is outside her cage she runs away from it. I'm trying to understand her behavior and body language but I'm still at a loss.

Stormie has gotten worse. I don't know what to do. She will not let me touch her. She will not come out of her cage unless she see's RC out. She has her wings back so she can fly but anytime I do manage to get her out, she flies away from my hand. If I try to pick her up in any way, shape or form, she screeches. I don't ever grab at her or anything so I don't understand why she is doing this. I have tried re-taming her but I don't know if I'm doing it wrong or what? Any advice?

Is your home set up in a way that would enable you to give her some flight time and then use fresh food in her cage as a way of getting her back into it without the stress of a chase? If not, could you afford to buy a true flight cage for her and just let her be in it all the time? Something about 6x3x 3' might be large enough, with the 6' length running sideways, not height. Are you thinking of getting another budgie mate for her? Not meaning to hit you with a dozen qxs, but I'm big on letting birds be birds and not insisting they interact with us unless they want to.

My best to you and her!

I live in a small apartment so a huge cage like that is out of the question. She has plenty of room in her cage and when I know I am going to be home for a while I just open her door and she comes out on her own. A mate be out of the question as well. The cage I have is good size but not quite big enough for two. She has kind of bonded herself to my cockatiel but he wants none of it. He is bonded to me and thats it. I found out about twenty minutes ago one of my friends picks her up and gently tosses her into the air to make her fly. I am wondering if this could be part of the problem. If it is, is there any way to fix it or is the damage already done? I feel terrible because stormie is such a beautiful bird and I don't want her cooped up forever so she becomes cage bound...Would training her build more trust? I just feel like I am running out of options. I could never get rid of her because I just have a feeling that this has to do with a major trust issue. Any advice you have will help!

One of your friends tosses your budgie up in the air to "make" her fly???????!!!!!!!
In other words, GRABS the budgie
Well, you can thank your friend for destroying the trust your budgie once had in humans There is your answer why she has regressed so much

Is there any way to fix this or is the damage done for good? If I would have known what my friend was doing sooner, I could have prevented this from happening. I feel like a terrible owner..

Yikes! Don't blame yourself. My humble advice is first and foremost keep the friend entirely away from her--not even in her sight!

Don't try to pick her up as she obviously thinks if that happens she will be "gently tossed". Let her continue to come out on her own and encourage her to come near you with toys, favorite food, etc. Very gradually, when she will come close and is relaxed, offer your hand for her to step up. Maybe if she is sitting near you and sees the cockatiel enjoy contact she will begin to feel that it's safe again. Good luck!

First, you need to consider what else might be happening when you're allowing your friend(s) access to your pets when you're not there to supervise. Second, how can you ensure that you're always there forevermore when friends are there?

Trust can definitely be rebuilt, with patience and kindness. I wonder tho why it even occurs to you to speak of (not) getting rid of her...??? Birds can be perfectly marvelous companions without being tame enough to touch. You can watch her play, talk and whistle with her, sing and dance. Why must she be tame to please you? You have your 'tiel to love on you. My advice is to let the scared little budgie observe you for awhile without having any pressure. But I do hope you'll continue to give her fly time and learn how to "trick" her back into her cage without catching her. Let her be free of hands until she's decided she's safe with you.

Charlie, my mitred conure, I can kind of "throw" him to make him go flying. He'll do a circle and fly back, or find a spot to land before deciding to come back. He's also the type that I can hold him in the palm of my hand on his back, and toss him in the air.... I don't have a video of it, but I also swing my mitred conure around while he's perched on my hand. I realize this all sounds horrible, but here's a video of another mitred who also enjoys being swung around!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfE2m1w2oDE

I once had to "teach" a budgie to fly again by tossing him into the air... he had all his flights but could not fly, so I would toss him onto a bed, forcing him to fly. After about two weeks training, tossing him for perhaps 15 mins at a time, 1-2 times a day at least, he was able to regain his flight.

Tossing isn't always a bad thing, but if it scares the bird then it's something that shouldn't be done.

Check out this thread, and the videos linked in the thread. I can provide more information later on, if you would like.
budgie/topic95839.html

MFids wrote: ...Tossing isn't always a bad thing, but if it scares the bird then it's something that shouldn't be done...

Thanks for the clarification, Monica I'm sure we were all assuming the little bird didn't step up and volunteer for being tossed. Yes, I regularly give a gentle flick of my wrist or head to send one of my flighted babes back into their playroom. They know what it means and never attempt to hang on ... and they aren't frightened by it.